Because PACN 35 is on its way and I can’t quite believe it, yet

Kababayan at UCI’s PACN 34: Behind the Scenes [Recap Trailer]

Because not only did it takes me hours to compile this short little video from last year’s PACN but, I still can’t quite believe that I’m in charge of making this happen.

I guess you could say I have a hard time believing myself to be of any good (sound familiar, friends?), that I too easily doubt myself, and look for my lack of potential thereof.

But, as the 40th-year of Kababayan at UCI, and our 35th annual Pilipino-American Cultural Night Production… It’s a big year for us. And I’m excited to create and let magic happen.

Sometimes, people were meant to be teachers, students, leaders… I have years of cultural dancing under my belt, yet, am I the most comfortable person teaching? Not quite (that’s my opinion, though). But, I’ve realized that maybe my hand is better tried at having an eye for things. Of looking at things at a whole. Of really comprehending the meaning of something and searching for the value of it…

My fascination with music and guitar and really looking deeply into that over the years… Of looking at music more aesthetically and something that could mean so much more than its surface level… My fascination with writing and blogging and feeling the need for small pieces to feel complete… Of looking for significance in every small thing… My knowledge of theater and knowing a good cultural performance from a bad one (and where it can be improved upon)… Maybe, I feel, I might have a better eye for things.

I’d never think in a million years that shy little quiet introverted Rachel would be standing here. But, isn’t that what my older brothers said as well? We all grew and were rooted from our involvement in Kariktan since 2005, dancing and growing up within our culture–together–when our culture wasn’t apparent elsewhere. And we found ourselves leading P(A)CNs at our respective schools as well.

Of course it’s scary and it’s a big responsibility but, please save the date for Friday, April 18th, 2014. It’s the culmination, and product, of a night I have been working on, coordinating, and directing all year long with a board of 35 other people I believe in.

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