What matters to me right now?

Hi. It’s been awhile since I’ve shared a proper update or recollection of where I am at this point in my life.

To be honest, it can be hard to go from all these highs in life then back to reality — love, excitement, fun and games, travel and play, the shared reflections and deep revelations, then back to this period of major transition, growth, and absolute limbo.

I read something this morning about in finding the answer, you have to change the question: “What matters to me right now?”

My whole life I’ve searched for the things, people, places and hobbies that would “light me up” — that sparked my joy and I followed.

And follow I have — for all my teenage years of growth and discovery to the resilience and wonder in my late twenties — to chasing down the music and songs and stories that resonated and made me feel seen and heard like no other; to sharing and expressing my love of my culture through dance for a whole decade to and with my peers; to playing and making music with my best friends; going on long drives to find myself and others; to radically leaving home on just a whim and a dream; to even waking up at 5am everyday to serve people their morning cup of joe and share a life moment as we conversed about each other’s trials and tribulations in this thing we call life.

These are the moments that lit me up the most. And while these may be things of my past, I still look ahead to what’s next.

“What matters to me right now?” I ask myself.

That’s all that matters, sometimes. (And allows us to be so effervescently present in each chapter of our lives, if I may add.)

“There are years that ask questions and years that answer,” they say.

Fall returns what leaves back to its roots.

“I hope you find the peace you’re looking for.”

Coming undone, 2022. (Photo: Edward Isais | @edwardisais)

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